Emancipation of A Drama Queen

I was awoken out of a dead sleep around 4:40am to the sounds of my roof and house creaking louder than normal and my bed was shaking. This isn’t really that abnormal because we are very close to two major railways. When the freight trains go by you can feel them if you are upstairs in our bed. The floor will bounce a tiny bit and it feels similar to standing on a bridge as cars drive over. This makes our bed shake a tad as well so we feel it mostly when we are laying in bed. We can’t feel the trains when we are downstairs for some reason though. Our house will also creak if the wind is strong. It is actually a very comforting and homey sound when we lay in bed upstairs and listen to the house pop and creak as the wind gusts by. It always makes me wonder how our house has stood through 114 years of wind, storms, rain, snow and so much more.

Are you wondering, “why the hell do I care about the antics of your house and what you do when you lay in bed?!” yet? Well, I do have a point. I’ll get to it soon.

Last night, as my house was creaking and my bed was shaking I quickly noticed the absence of a train, and wind. My house was apparently shaking for no reason. Weird. Hub’s was sleeping downstairs because Monster had literally kicked him out of bed. I just laid there next to a snoring Monster whose feet were firmly planted in my side and I just continued thinking, “Hm, my bed is shaking, a lot. Dammit, I was sound  asleep and having a great dream! I cannot believe we are having a stupid earthquake. I live outside of Chicago and a stupid-ass earthquake is disturbing my sleep! This is pretty cool.”

“Ssssnnnnnzzzzzzzzzz….”

Sunrise came and I was yet again woken out of a dead sleep only this time it was by DramaBoy staring at me from the side of my bed. I get up and follow him downstairs and run straight to pee (a 114-year old house equipped with one tiny bathroom downstairs… I do not get up in the middle of the night unless I’m about to explode and can’t sleep). As I walk back into the livingroom I am startled by the fact that my husband is still in his pajamas sitting in the chair. It is Friday, not Saturday.

Sidebar: Apparently I was up all night throwing up because I had food poisoning so he had to stay home from work to help me today. Cool. What a guy. Thankfully I woke up feeling a lot better.

Anyway, I asked, “Um, babes? Can I ask you a really stoopid question?”

“Sure.”

“Um, did we have an earthquake last night?”

“Yes! We really did!” he said straight-faced and matter of factly.

“SHUT UP! I knew it!” I screeched and immediately turned on the t.v.

“….. the Midwest experienced a 5.2 magnitude earthquake in the early morning hours….”

“Babe! You just had your earthquake cherry popped! You are now ready to live in Phoenix.” I said proudly.

This wasn’t my first. I have been through a fairly good quake that was centered pretty close to where I lived when I was a kid. Then I just felt the small shocks from another major quake centered in the California desert in the middle of the night while I was at work. I was on the fourth floor of my building in Tempe and felt things bounce around for a few seconds.

Since I did a science project in 7th grade on earthquakes, tectonic plates and fault zones I feel that I am incredibly well versed in the seismic geology. I also happen to be a complete seismic geek with a sick obsession with earthquakes. Because of my incredibly profound background knowledge I knew that a quake in the Midwest was not unusual. I also knew that one of the largest quakes to hit the continental United States was in Missouri in the 1800’s. Blah blah blah… I told you, I’m a geek.

So we had an earthquake. Cool. I say that as calm and cool as I can but I’m secretly doing back flips and screeching like a school-girl because we totally had an earthquake! WHOO!

At least I am not writing about yet another personal meltdown or something funny my kids did or about poop. My lame earthquake story should be a blessing today.