Safe Texting: Get yourself a text bitch

You know you aren’t supposed to text while driving. But everyone still does… well, those who are text-addicted anyway.

So, while we were on our way into the city on Sunday, hub’s got texted. He was driving.  Here is our converstation….

Me – dude. don’t be textin’ and drivin. you know you can’t multi-task.

Hubs – oh hush. here, type “good for you” for me.

Me – so now I’m your texting bitch? fine. <me typing… g-o-o-d ….>

Hubs – You got that right sistah!

Me – do you want me to put the number 4 or spell f-o-r?

Hubs – just use the #4.

Me – OK. Do you want me to spell out y-o-u or just use the letter u?

Hubs – the letter.

Me - OK. Just checking cuz if I’m the texting bitch I gotta represent you the right way. If you ain’t usein’ the textin’ shortcuts then I won’t, you know when I’m doing your biddin’ dawg. <beating my chest with some phony gangland sign>

(Yeah, we totally like to pretend we are ghetto like that… seriously. Our kids are going to be so fucked up.)

So, if you are going to text and drive, at least have a designated texter with you. The drivers of the world will thank you.